Author Archives: local girl

work idiot

May 5, 2009 – 11:00 am

words
everyone at work must think i’m a massive moron - here’s why:
“I can’t log into tomcat” IT’S CALLED TOPCAT
“I’ll meet with Amber after lunch” “I’M AMBER” RETARD
“I’m leaving early for a dental appointment” “I gots the day wrong” “BOO”
TWAT

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a bank holiday

May 4, 2009 – 11:00 am

Much like last time I’m only going to force myself to post every weekday or its just too much for poor ol’ me

words
hello! I’ve had an extremely heavy but lovely bank holiday weekend
FRIDAY -> Went to see my parents and gran for dinner
“Why don’t you use out new doorbell” [SLAM]
Later I went for a couple [...]

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smashed minge

May 1, 2009 – 11:00 am

Sozzy the posts still arent coming out that well, brought my lappy in again today so we’ll see…

words
Today I smashed my minge on my bike. i was trying to overtake a loser on a Brompton. NOBODY STOPPED TO HELP.
O pre-empted having nothing to do today so I brought my laptop in to try and get [...]

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Yeah so its text only, so sue me

April 30, 2009 – 11:00 am

Why am I text only? Our internet got cut off while I was installing Ubuntu on my laptop :( What a shitty day - and it had no right to be as I’d taken the day off (told my boss I had swine flu). Managed to, almost right away get into a big argument with [...]

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loyalty schemes, folderchat and others

April 29, 2009 – 11:00 am

words
I am a big fan of the coffee loyalty scheme they run in our canteen, however, I think they should expand it:
7 coffees: free coffee
100 coffees: day off
50000 coffees: promotion
I totally covered myself in soup today, what a story!
I had unix club today but I forgot to bring my laptop. That means the teacher made [...]

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other people like charlie brooker

April 28, 2009 – 10:00 am

TVGOHOME & newswipe

words
worl was pretty much a  drag today. Although I did find out my project manager, who I thought I had nothing in common with is a MASSIBE Charlie Brooker fan. I mean you can’t fault that. I sent her a link to TVGOHOME cause I’m such a fucking guru on misanthropic comedy.
I’m glad [...]

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cafe anomaly

April 27, 2009 – 10:00 am

words
I went to meet my family for lunch today & something very unexpected happened.
“May I take your order?”
- “Can’t you see we just sat down!?”
[This wasn't it]
“Here, speak to granny”
- “I wish I was dead.”
[This wasn't it either]
[[Crying]]
yes yes this was it.
My mu sent me & James a chain email with loads of pictures of [...]

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[strip] Late night shopping

April 26, 2009 – 11:51 am

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fart roulette

April 26, 2009 – 11:00 am

Hi i’ll now be (or trying to if I remember) posting every post at 11am GMT for some kind of consistency and professionalism!!!

words
Have you ever played fart roulette in the lift? You get in the lift (alone) - fart, and pray to bejesus nobody gets in…
My current job bores the privilege that I can wander [...]

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signal? SIGNAL? signal?

April 25, 2009 – 3:26 am

This has tortured me all day.

words
I was nearly killed by a driver today so he shouted at me for 20 minutes…
Why didn’t you signal?
- I did signal - cockballs
You didn’t i didn’t see you signal
- Well I did - you cock, can’t yous ee a signal?
Oh why don’t you swear more that will make you [...]

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